"THE LORD DISCIPLINES THOSE HE LOVES"
Heb.12:6

Preface this by understanding that I never sweat drops of blood while in the process of being obedient. Luke 22:44. And considering the Hall of Fame in Hebrews 11, I shudder to think how minor are my inconveniences in this life. Now to get on with airing the present situation.


"God disciplines us for our good that we may share in His holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Heb. 12:10-12.

At this present time and for the past several months it is unmistakable that God is disciplining me. Looking back over the last several years I can see how pride, lust, and self worship have been large stumbing blocks in my desire to be a disciple of Jesus.


Now I have nowhere else to turn. As a family, we are headed for extended periods of time spent apart. We face the largest financial challenge we have ever faced in out marriage. And we are still the primary care givers for Gail's mom.


Making the right decisions has never been more crutial. And in the past I have made the same kind of decisions and some of them were wrong. So I expect that some of my present decisions will be wrong. How I wish to live so as not to disappoint Jesus. Particularly during this time of discipline.

The greatest part about being in grave circumstances is how real Jesus is to me. I can barely move without realizing that it is He who allows movement. I can barely speak without the same realization. Since I am prone to panic and worry, I am driven to my knees regularly throughout the day because my mind and body need the relief. It was just yesterday that I understood not to pray for escape. Jesus will never leave nor forsake, Heb.13:5. Isn't it great. That means that along with staying the course, whatever that is, I will not be abandoned. As a matter of fact, I know that the Lord is near because He has to be in order to have me under His discipline.

Calm waters and smooth sailing are part of walking with Jesus. Unfortunately I have not learned how to be fully surrendered during those times, so I am taking greater comfort than usual in the surrender that comes so readily at this time of discipline.

Moving to Texas was an impetuous decision. We allowed our personal desires to have to much control. Since we have moved here we have seen His hand at work in our lives and through our lives, so I am convinced that He is using us regardless. We now face the difficulty of trying to figure out how to make a living while staying here in Texas. Our source of income is in California. Gail never really liked California. What am I going to do?


I'm going to start spending most of my time working at our business in California. If the business fails, I guess we can stay in Texas and find some other source of income. Or we can move to where there is a job offer. If the business succeeds I would very reluctant to start this process all over again of living in Texas and visiting the business in California for just one week a month. At this point in time it seems that we are in the financial fix that we are in because of the folly of believing that our small business doesn't need every laborer to be at work. I can no longer justify receiving a paycheck and not show up for work.

This isn't going to be easy. I will either have to move all of us back to California, or sell the business. There is really no other option that I can see. And neither of these options sounds very good right now. Like I said, this is small potatoes compared to real suffering for Jesus, but I must get this down on paper so that later I can rejoice in the Lord's provision, having clearly documented the event.

Finally I don't like blogs that read like journals. And my blog has become a journal lately. Maybe I can amend this in the future. Maybe not.

RELOCATING

We moved. After nine months of offering our house for sale we have sold and relocated. God has done it all. We have so much to be thankful for. We are in a very comfortable home, Gail's mom is very happy with her room and we are emptying boxes and setting up.

The main reason for this blog is to commemorate what God has done to make all of this possible. We listed our home for sale during a down market. We were told by our real estate agent that only 9% of all the home buyers in our area would even look at our house. At times we were quite discouraged. Keeping our home staged for sale for the better part of a year isn't easy. We prayed our way through a lot of disappointment and uncertainty.

After several months of being listed for sale and with no prospects in sight, I awoke one day with the clear message that we should start looking for a new home to move to. We began to look dil ligently. The process of elimination helped us to know where we wanted to relocate to as well as giving us the satisfaction of knowing that we had researched all of the available areas and price ranges and were satisfied with the choices that were left.

Now we were ready for our home to sell. We live on the principle of "we do our part and the Lord does His." We prayed for a buyer and we said that we would accept the buyers offer. An offer came. It was quite low. At the time that the offer came in I was traveling with my brother in law and his son. They knew all the details of our promise to the Lord and were listening to my end of the phone conversation when I got the news of the offer. I didn't like such a low offer. I wanted to change my promise to the Lord. As I struggled quietly I realized that greed had set in. I explained everything to my brother in law and his son. I asked for them to pray for me. It was great. After the prayer,l called back, accepted the offer and I was free to continue the joy of our travels together as well as knowing that my promise was good.

The very next day the offer was rescinded. We were back on the market. Several weeks passed and another offer came in. This time it was for more money. We accepted again. This time it was a go and the rest is history.

God is so good. His timing is perfect. He disciplines us for our good just like we discipline our children. We have learned another step in the surrendering process. I hate the lessons but I love the results.

THE GOLDEN YEARS

Might as well cut right to the chase. It is unbiblical to retire. This is not a popular position but it is well supported by scripture. 1 Corinthians 15:58 says, "therefore my dear brothers stand firm, let nothing move you, always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord because you that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." [italics mine.] Matthew 6:33 states, "seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you." And another passage is 11 Corinthians 5:15, "and He died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for Him who died for them and was raised again."

So often we are encouraged to live a different life style in the later years of life. Very well meaning individuals tell us that we should "take it easy" enjoy life a little, slow down and smell the roses, do some of the things that you always wanted to do but were too tied down at work to pursue. Financial planners make this theme the center point of their presentation. And we gobble it up because it appeals to our selfish nature. Even solid Christian believers are swayed by this relatively recent trend in civilization.

We loose sight of our purpose. God didn't give you a job all those years for the purpose of making money, He gave you that vocation as a pulpit. Your vocation is your pulpit. Now, you may be forced to retire from a particular job, so if that happens, just change pulpits. No man who is truly sold out for Christ would be comfortable idling away his days with self indulgent activities that sideline the calling made on their lives by Jesus.

Retirement is coming. Big Time. Like nothing you have ever seen or heard. And it is coming very soon. Never in your own history have you been more equipped to serve in the army of Christ. With each passing year, He gives you more and more so that you can serve and give.

The Christian life is often referred to as a marathon. And what do the marathon runners do when they get to the final turn. They pour on the steam. They can see the finish line. They can smell victory. They know that there is rest after the finish line. That's the best way to view our calling in Jesus. Run like a man who wants to win. And when you near the end,[retirement years] step on the gas, the finish line is coming right up.

MY WAY

God has granted me a lot more than I give Him credit for. If you will for just a moment forget about the minor detail that He created us and the planet on which we live and the universe that gives us pause. Leaving all of those things aside I want to focus on daily desires.

Paul writes in Romans 1:20 that God is clearly seen by man through what God has created and that if man would only think about it a little bit he would realize that he is without excuse when it comes to acknowledging the existence of God.

Later in the chapter Paul explains how God gave man up to his own desires, to idolatry and immorality and all manner of evil. The way I read this, God grants man the desires of his heart. Man demands what he wants, proceeds to take what he wants and God grants man the option of being that self driven. When the Bible says that God gave man over to the desires of his heart, the Bible is describing how God is giving you what you want.

I'll give you an example from my own life. For several years I wanted a particular boat. I had never owned a boat but I traveled in the circle of friends who did own boats and I had my heart set on a particular brand and style of boat. I loved boats. I loved everything about boats. They consumed me. They were in my mind and in my heart even in the off season. And then one year, I made enough money to buy the boat that I wanted. My first boat. Not realizing it at the time, I worshiped my boat. It was my idol. It defined me. I cared for it more than I cared for anything else.

That my friend is idol worship. It is what Paul was describing in the 1st chapter of Romans. God had granted me the desire of my heart. Put another way, God was punishing me by giving me what I wanted. God punishes the human race by giving the human race what it wants.

In our minds we stop being the creators creatures, and we start being our own God. And when that happens we start saying things like, " I'm a self made man." I don't need anyone or anything. I can make anything happen that I want, starting from scratch." It's that kind of talk that gets us to believing that there is no creator. Or if there is one, He's not really part of my life.

This is referred to as a hardness of the heart. Once we are fully given over to the mindset that we are the god of our own lives, we are living very far outside the possibility of redemption. So much so that we have ourselves convinced that we don't need redemption granted to us, we can grant it to ourselves. This is very dangerous territory in deed. We can go to the end of our days convinced that there is no ultimate justice, that there is no reconing, and that somehow everyone moves on to a better place because that is how we would design it.

So you see, this is how easy it is to be outside the redemption of God. This is how easy it is to be blinded by our own nature. God not only reveals Himself to us through His handiwork which is all around us, He reveals Himself to us through His word, The Bible. Give yourself a break. Think outside of yourself for a moment. Consider actually reading His word and allowing Him to speak to you through it.

CHURCHMEN

It was never my intent to be a churchman. Early on in my beginnings with Jesus, I held on to the idea that I really didn't fit in to a church structure. I am not a joiner, I don't like committee's, I think that Christian men can easily fall into the pattern of only associating with other Christian men, and the results of that are what I refer to as "the holy huddle."

Now I think that without churchmen, we are in real trouble. Women are far more involved in the church than men. Women make up a disproportionate number of any volunteer activity in the church. Men are vital to the body of Christ. I am grateful that there are men who are volunteers and who do not take my stance against participating.

As of now however, Gail and I are participating in several ministries in our church. And it's not so bad. I have adjusted my thinking about this and realize that I can be a witness in the world, spend time discipling men on the outside and be intimately involved in the church's on going service to the greater Frisco area.

Over and over again, Jesus shows me that my fears are unfounded. He guides me gently and teaches me with grace. This is true for all believers. Just stay available and willing.

OBEDIENCE

If you will go back and read the post from mid March, you will see the seeds of this new direction that God has given us.
After spending three weeks in Los Angeles, managing the business during my general managers vacation absence, I finally submitted to what God has been calling me to do. Gail and I are putting our house on the market for sale this coming week. With the proceeds from the sale of this house we are going to buy a home we can pay for. The reduction in monthly expenses will permit us to take a substantial pay cut. This in turn will allow the business some breathing room and perhaps just enough extra cash flow to remain solvent.

The whole idea is centered around us being obedient to the call that we believe God has made on our lives. He has not asked us to change any other portion of our financial picture. We can stay living in this area, stay in our present church, and stay near the doctors and hospitals that are so vital for Gail's mom.

I didn't want to do it. I proposed several options to the Lord rather than do what he was asking. And all of the options were padded in my favor so as not to have to face my piers and family with the ugly truth that I simply could not afford to go on living as we do.

The great part is that every time God has told us to adjust our finances, He has been faithful to continue to provide for us and we in turn are comforted by the fellowship with Him that obedience guarantees.

This doesn't mean that cutting back is fun for us. It doesn't mean that we are joyful throughout the process. It doesn't mean that we don't mourn the loss of neighborhood friends and comfortable surroundings and familiar patterns. What it does mean is that we remain in the center of God's will, and after all, that is all that really matters.

Because of His grace we can continue to have the blessing of giving. Because of His grace we can operate out in the open, free from the shackles of personal bondage, brought on by greed and pride. Nothing in this world is worth clinging to that God wants removed.

So I remember these three reasons surrounding the salvation we have received.

1] You want to be wherever God wants you.

2] Anything God removes you do not need.

3] Anytime God makes an offer--accept it.

POSTERITY

Making toy guns for my grandsons has been one of the bigger thrills of my tenure. It started out quite innocently enough, my first grandson was playing at our house one afternoon and he asked me to make him a gun. I drew a small rifle on a piece of plywood and proceeded to cut it out with a jig saw. After a little smoothing, voila, a toy gun. He played with it and left it at our house when he went home.

For several weeks after that I kept thinking about trying to make him a toy gun that more resembled a real one, keeping in mind to scale it to size. My daughter in law wasn't too keen on guns. So without asking her, I started to lay out a replica of a Winchester Model 94 Rifle. After the gun was mostly completed, I asked my daughter in law if it was O.K. for me to make a gun for her son. She already knew what I was up to and relented.

It was big fun, making that gun. The last stage was to paint it. Gail,[my wife] and I worked on the painting and finishing together. It was a fine re-creation of an Old Western Rifle.

We gave it to him for his birthday. By now his younger brother was old enough to go outside and play, so when they were both at our house I would give the younger brother the original plywood gun and my older grandson had his new birthday gun. In the midst of playing cowboys, the younger son said "mine's not even painted." Well, that did it. I promised him a new gun for his birthday.

And so it went. From that day forward I have been making toy guns for my grandsons for their birthdays. Every year they print out a picture of the gun they want and I scale it down to their size and duplicate it. As they grow, I make the guns a little larger.

Now here's the best part. These boys do not lack for toys. But when I am sent photos of family vacations, one or more of those guns are in the pictures. Even their friends think the guns are cool.

So, today I arrive at their house in the early evening. It's still daylight out and as I pull up my oldest grandson is running across the street with the M16 I made for him. Hiding in the garage is a neighbor boy holding a Thompson Sub Machine Gun from a previous birthday and as I enter the front door of the house, my youngest grandson is just on his way out carrying his Side by Side Double Barrel Shotgun.

I don't know what floats your boat, but this was just about the best moment I could have with these boys. They will probably not remember very much of me when they grow to be men, but they will remember the guns.